Keeping it all in Perspective

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I know, I know...so sometimes I tend to over react about things and feel like no one understands or can relate to my pain. But don't we all feel that way when we hurt? We look around and see only the good in everyone else's lives. Their laughter, their joy, their fun. The jealousy we feel is just another nail through our hearts. When I go to this place in my mind, I do try to remember that there are people with worse circumstances. Then of course, this adds guilt to the jealousy and pain and makes me more upset. As I start this summer off with the battle I face each year, I say a prayer for a dear friend I lost 2 years ago. A teaching mentor. I worked with her as she was battling cancer and I wondered how she stayed so strong. When I asked her that question, she told me that her pain was no big deal compared to the pain that Jesus must have felt when he was nailed to the cross. It was just the way that she said it that dumbfounded me. Just light, bubbly and carefree. So selfless. I think back on that day often, as she enjoyed our time together teaching first graders. There was no stress, there was no pain, only sharing the joy of the human spirit. When it comes down to it, that is really all that we need. I got a dose of that this evening, with good friends and laughter, and later, an understanding conversation with someone who gets me like no one ever has in my life. While I am not saying that my pain has disappeared or doesn't matter, it certainly does feel better when someone understands. ~Susan