Keeping it all in Perspective

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I know, I know...so sometimes I tend to over react about things and feel like no one understands or can relate to my pain. But don't we all feel that way when we hurt? We look around and see only the good in everyone else's lives. Their laughter, their joy, their fun. The jealousy we feel is just another nail through our hearts. When I go to this place in my mind, I do try to remember that there are people with worse circumstances. Then of course, this adds guilt to the jealousy and pain and makes me more upset. As I start this summer off with the battle I face each year, I say a prayer for a dear friend I lost 2 years ago. A teaching mentor. I worked with her as she was battling cancer and I wondered how she stayed so strong. When I asked her that question, she told me that her pain was no big deal compared to the pain that Jesus must have felt when he was nailed to the cross. It was just the way that she said it that dumbfounded me. Just light, bubbly and carefree. So selfless. I think back on that day often, as she enjoyed our time together teaching first graders. There was no stress, there was no pain, only sharing the joy of the human spirit. When it comes down to it, that is really all that we need. I got a dose of that this evening, with good friends and laughter, and later, an understanding conversation with someone who gets me like no one ever has in my life. While I am not saying that my pain has disappeared or doesn't matter, it certainly does feel better when someone understands. ~Susan

Meeting OPN

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Only the 2nd official day of vacation and I am having trouble adjusting from the high demands of school in June to the void of any and all routine at home. I am free falling into the vacuum of meeting other peoples needs while trying to figure out what my own needs are and how they are going to be met. In summers past, I have been in denial about the necessity to put a plan in place for my own needs, only to hit rock bottom in early August when I learn that no one is going to take care of ME except for ME. So as I chauffeured children around today, fixed food, cleaned up messes, did laundry and fed the dog that is not mine...I tried to mentally sort some things out. Not sure where I am going or how I am going to get there...but hope I make it with my sanity in tact. ~Sue

Monday, June 28, 2010

Monday, June 28, 2010

True love. Soul mates. Doing what you want to do, how you want to do it, on your own terms. While looking at my cousin, Jim's wedding in Hawaii photos this evening, I fell in love with this picture. The traditional ring shot. I remember being so concerned about my own and had to remind the photographer to make sure that there was not a tossed salad in the frame. This one took my breath away. Not only do we see their wedding bands, but his watch. Symbolizing this precious moment in time. Also, both of their feet appear below, symbolizing the journey they each walked to find each other. The entire composition is so full of love and meaning. While my day today was rather uneventful...I did reflect a whole lot...on my life...and the love I have experienced on my own journey. I decided that Kimberly and Jimmy would be my feet today. May you walk with each other through much happiness, and always on your own terms! ~Sue

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Sunday, June 27, 2010
A relaxing Sunday by the pool. Beautiful summer day...Jillian swam while I read Loving Frank. Read this book 2 summers ago and decided that I needed to read it again. Would have loved to have known Frank Lloyd Wright. A gifted architect who was influenced by his love of the repetition and perfection he saw in nature. A true artist who was in search of someone who truly understood him. I think we could have had some interesting conversations. While not really a fan of Frank's architectural designs, I understand them and appreciate the way that they communicate his feelings and opinions. Funny how art works that way. While we may not like everything that we see, if we know the story and the thinking behind it, we may be able to learn something and even become a little more open minded. Just love when art opens our eyes like that.

Saturday, June 26, 2010
Today was the official kick off of summer vacation as I didn't have to step foot in that school! What a great feeling. Also a great feeling to start the summer off at a happy, healthy weight :-) My goal is to be in the same place in September. Just need to stay active and be careful of the beverages with calories...wine...fun summer beer...cute frozen drinks with umbrellas...but shouldn't be too hard. If so I'll just add on another 4 mile walk per day! ~Susan

Kicking off the Second Summer of the Sole Sisters: Day 1 Friday, June 25, 2010

Just as I treated our first day back to school in September as just another day of vacation, (being it was pre-Labor Day)...I decided that I would begin my summer on Friday, June 25, despite the fact that it was a work day. I had no work to do, seeing as everything I use was packed in boxes. My computer was gone and it was evident that I was in everyone's way when I tried to just physically be IN my classroom. The destruction had begun well before my arrival with the ripping out of the heating system. So I spent my day wandering about the building going from the computer lab, to the gym, to the teachers' room, my car, the music room and eventually finished the day in Cheryl's cave of a 3rd grade classroom. I did catch a few minutes alone to capture this photo of the day. Once I uploaded it, I noticed that my new classroom window appears out the window of my old room. Such a perfect sign that my new environment will reflect what I built and everything that built me as a teacher in that first art room that I called home for 14 years. Time to end one era and begin a new one. I am ready. ~Susan